Highlights: a reoccurring question that haunts singles is that of ‘types’: who is my type, and where do I find him/her? Books like these pose theories, but the simple answer comes from the Times Vows section: your type is you, and the closer you can get to you, the better. The extreme case was reported here some months ago, but never has this been more true than with Greenstein and Frasco, a couple whose looks AND background are so strikingly alike that the New Jersey department of weddings and divorces demanded a DNA test to ensure the state wasn’t condoning an incestuous marriage .

Nauseating similarities: both ensconced in the  Jewish New Jersey country club circuit; both Cornell grads (she only with honors! Fa!); both lawyers; both Fraternity/Sorority riff raff; both were at the same trashy spring break destination when they met.

What their kids will look like: take a guess.

Grades: Compatibility: F teacher’s comments: would you be compatible with yourself? Yes! Does that mean you should marry yourself? No! Longevity: A Teacher’s comments: if things ever get rough they’ll go back to Alcho-pulco and renew their vows over a beer funnel. Likeability: F “He’s a good dancer.” Translation: he does the white man’s overbite to the Doobie Brothers. “She has a great sense of humor.” Translation: Highly doubtful, unless she finds this post funny, in which case she’s hilarious. FINAL GRADE: F!! Second F in a row!! Teacher throws chalk at the students in disgust and stomps out of the classroom!!

But Wait! There’s More Like This: